ROALD Dahl once wrote in his book Boy: “When writing about oneself, one must strive to be truthful. Truth is more important than modesty.”

After a great deal of toing and froing about how to go about writing a food review on the Lunch Box in Trowbridge, I ultimately decided to heed Mr Dahl’s advice.

That meant being rather critical of the Fore Street eatery - sorry Trowbridge.

For this review, I once again called on my pal, Bones.

In terms of appearances, it looked nice enough.

I am referring to the Lunch Box and not Bones, although he is a cool-looking geezer.

The room is pleasant and airy, much appreciated on a hot day, and on arrival I was greeted by a cheery waitress.

Bones, having got there before me, had ordered the Milkshake Madness (£3.95) and I went for a tried and trusted apple juice (£2).

The friendly waitress showed a healthy dollop of patience, due to my slowness at ordering a meal.

Eventually, I went for the fishcakes with scampi, chips and beans (£7.95) and Bones ordered the mega breakfast, complete with a fried egg, baked beans, bacon, sausages, mushrooms and hash browns (£7.95).

On my meal of choice, it said ‘beans’.

I stupidly thought that meant beans other than baked beans. Doh!

I put it down to being a dozy fool and having a poor night’s sleep in my tiny sauna room - I don’t actually have a sauna, just to add.

I regret to say, that from this juncture, there was an unpleasant switch from my refreshing beverage.

The figurative storm clouds began to gather and before I knew it, my experience there did not go very well.

The fishcake was very bland, sort of like a mediocre frozen dinner.

The chips seemed to be a bit overcooked and the scampi was nothing special.

Bones, who also ordered a Coke (£2) seemed to enjoy his meal as he said he was enjoying his meal.

However, he said it was a mistake going for the mega breakfast as he had a pretty poor attempt at getting through the hefty breakfast.

I thought about going for a dessert but I was so put off by the underwhelming food, that I left it at that.

Although we had finished our meals, the food was not cleared away for over 10 minutes.

In a place of 10+ tables, there was only one other table being used by customers.

The smiley waitresses were content to sit by the counter and either play on their phone or look disinterested.

Sure the place was practically empty, but I think it is important to look professional when you are at work, serving customers.

Of the many places I have been lucky enough to review, this was in the bottom quartile.

There was a decent amount of food to choose from and it wasn’t overpriced. Maybe my meal was a bad one-off, but this is how I honestly felt.

I am glad to see the reviews on TripAdvisor were kind as if I were to leave one, it would not be a positive one at all, unfortunately.

The bill came to £23.45.

Richard Mills